Has this ever happened to you? You go to your Slav friends house, you sit down for some food.. ..but all you can say is.. What the blin is this?! Well, friends, this is Russian pelmeni. Is meat dumplings, Russian style. Very good taste. Let’s make some. You know your grandmama, she always say: Streeeeloook.. No, no. Wait, wait, wait. She always say if you do not learn to cook for yourself.. You will die of starvation in the future. Sounds familiar, yes. Well, don’t worry Boris is here to help. To make Russian pelmeni, it’s not very difficult. Add one egg. I suggest you get from chicken. Add about 250ml of water. Don’t worry, I will put amounts in the description. Next, you take the biggest whisk you can find.. ..and whisk it all together. Nothing too crazy, just so they would mix. Add some salt, about 2 teaspoons. And whisk all together again. This part very important. It’s all purpose flour. You need to take measurement to put in.. ..exactly.. ah fuck it, you put in as much as it takes. You’re basically making dough so you just put some in.. ..stir it together, put some more in.. ..and even more because you fucked up. And even more because you’re not making blins. So just keep adding flour. No, still keep going. Yes, much better. If it does not completely stick to your hands.. ..then it’s good to go. Take it out of bowl and give it a good Slav massage. But nothing too crazy, you’re not trying to revive your dead cat. After you have finished your sensual massage.. put it under cover or in a plastic wrap. Let it calm down for about 20-30 minutes. And you can go take shower because you feel like dirty wh- Next thing we need to do is make the filling for our pelmeni. For about 500g of minced meat I use 1 onion and 2 cloves of garlic. Or 7 if you are a Slav. But for the amount of dough we have just made I suggest you use 1 clove of garlic and half onion. The objective here is to make onion and garlic as small as possible. If you are modern Slav then you will have food processor at home. Use it, it will make it into good paste. Or if you’re lazy or a classic Slav like I am.. Then just use the knife skills you have learned in CS:GO. I hear people have strategy of what to do with onion so it does not make you cry. I say no, in Slav country we fight back! Show onion who is boss, blin. So what you need to do is make into as small pieces as you can. You don’t want big pieces of onion sticking out of pelmeni. Same thing with garlic. And add into bowl with all the minced meat. Add some salt and pepper and that looks perfect. Next, what you need to do is mix it all together. I suggest you use hand but you can use fork or spoon if you want. But I guess most of you guys who are watching are used to touching your me- And we go back to the dough. Take out the rolling pin that your mama always chases you with around the house. Exactly like the last time you came home drunk again. Start rolling out the dough and don’t forget to add flour to every bit of it. Otherwise dough will stick to table like Chernobyl reactor core.. ..stick to it’s concrete grave. Next thing you need to do is take something round like maybe a drink glass.. ..and start cutting out circles. Remember, you need to make dough as thin as possible.. The correct sequence of how to make the perfect pelmeni is very complicated. Once you have made all the circles.. it’s time to make magic. Take some meat, put into pelmeni.. ..stick it together. You see, friends, for demonstration I use fat shell for pelmeni. For is not break so easy. I’ll show you three examples of how to pelmeni fold. First of all, the classic lazy Slav way. You fold it together.. pinch the edges.. and there you go. Half moon. For next example I use the classic Russian pelmeni style. You pinch the edge, you pull the tips together and fold them together like this. Do not be afraid to try many times. It takes practice. Last way is Boris custom way. For this you pull four edges apart and connect them at the top. I call this one the Cheeki Breeki bag of meat. Once you have finished crafting the rest of the pelmeni.. ..get yourself a good-sized pot to fit them all inside. Fill pot with vodka to half or water if you are casual.. ..add some salt and set to boil. Meanwhile you have enough time to make some CS:GO. So once water boils, come back and put in the pelmeni. For this we have special tool. I have no idea how to call this in English so I call it The Pelmeninator. Use The Pelmeninator to put in the pelmenis into the boiling water.. ..and not too many at once so they don’t stick together. Once they are all inside do not forget to move them around. And all together you should boil them for about 7 minutes. This should again give you just about enough time to clean your filthy kitchen. Once 7 minutes pass use The Pelmeninator again to scoop them out of the water. And onto your plate. Traditionally served with sour cream on top. But because I am fucking Boris I will use mayonnaise like normal. I suggest you try one way or another. They are both good. And again.. let the dill or the green onion fall from the heavens.. ..as much as you like. There you go, my friends. Pelmeni is served. So next time you go to your Slav friends house.. ..don’t be afraid to try it out. Also take some sprats or shproti and maybe some tourist delight as well. Well, friends, go ahead, I dare you to try this shit out. Because in difficulty rating of holy shit to fucking hell it’s pretty much hardcore blin. I’ll see you next time, friends. Keep it Cheeki Breeki.